Human Equations
by kurosora1984
Summary: One delinquent punk sophomore plus one studious senior tutor times the power of 8-inch cock divided by initial antagonism times (40-minute tutoring period times 3 days a week times 4 weeks) equals boyfriends. Equation solved for EggDropSoup plus commission. Aku plus Roku equals there will be no actual math in this story because OW MY HEAD.


**Author's Note:** Hey guys! Here's another shortfic for ya, a double-drabble commission for the ever-loverly **EggDropSoup**! Molest her with thanks! And...wow, I guess this isn't gonna be rated M for actual, acted-out sexual content. O_O I guess it's rated for language and sexual...discussions? Sexual language? Explicit talking? LOL I dunno, but I hope you enjoy! 8D

It is SO past time to go get my poor original fic updated, so that's next! xP

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**Human Equations**

_He had not expected this_…would be the understatement of the flipping millennium.

Axel was a good person, darn it, he really was. He was nice to people, tried to make his parents happy, made a cool big brother, got straight A's in school, played first violin in Orchestra, and now, as a senior, had become the president of the Chemistry Club. He decided to join the in-school tutoring program as his graduation project, and because they were always desperate for science and math tutors. His teachers loved him, the principal loved him, he was fairly popular, and everyone in his Honors classes was a friend. He really thought that the students who came for tutoring would be nice to him as well. He just sort of assumed they were in the program because they wanted to improve.

He had made all the wrong assumptions, at least as far as Roxas was concerned.

The first day the short blond sophomore had showed up for last-period tutoring, Axel had blinked a moment, then pushed himself past the appearances. Never judge a book by its cover, and all that. Or, never judge a student by his…gel-spiked, bleached hair, deep blue eyes surrounded by black makeup, barbells all over his face, ears full of gauged metal spikes, leather collar, arms dark with tattoos of complex and wicked-looking blades, wrists and fingers bearing countless accessories, clothes that came in many layers – colors dark, skulls the most prominent image, torn edges a-plenty – and all or that carried with crossed arms and a sharp glare. _Never…judge…_

Axel cleared his throat nervously and held out his hand. "Ah, hello…I'm Axel, your tutor, and…"

"You're a four-eyed, brown-nosing geek. Why don't you leave me the fuck alone?"

Frowning, Axel pushed his glasses up his nose self-consciously. He didn't think they looked that bad. His mom said the dark, narrow rectangular frames flattered his features… _Calm down, he's just a sophomore._ Axel shifted his weight and straightened his button-down shirt, then glanced at the sign-in sheet. "So, um, are you…Roxas? I'm supposed to tutor a sophomore called Roxas this period. You need some help with Math 10?"

A harsh sigh. The kid sat up, leaned forward, and slammed his elbows onto the desk. "No, shithead, I _don't_ need some help with Math-fucking-10. I can fail that shit just fine on my own. It's the flabby-assed bitch of a teacher who wants me here. She hates my ass."

Clearing his throat, Axel ventured, "Well…maybe you shouldn't _be_ one."

"What?" Roxas snapped.

Axel flushed. "You heard me."

The corner of Roxas' mouth twitched. "_What_ did you call me?"

"An…um." Axel cleared his throat again. "You're an…ah, well, you know…" he trailed off weakly.

Roxas snorted. "Shit, you can't even say it? An _ass_. What kind of fucking senior _are_ you?"

Huffing, Axel rolled his eyes. "Um, I don't know, one who's going to get into college and get a decent job someday?"

He got a sharp laugh for that, and the kid sat back again, studying him with a look that was still sharp, but less belligerent. More amused and calculating. "Yeah, _that_ sounds like fun. That sounds like a fucking _blast_. Christ, how do you _handle_ the ecstasy?"

Sitting down across from the jerk of a student, Axel frowned. "You know, being a responsible citizen doesn't mean you can't have any fun, just more healthy and…"

"Ohhhh, fuck!" Roxas laughed, faking a moan. "Shit, stop, it sounds so good! I'm fuckin' cumming!"

Axel's face flamed with heat, his breath catching as panic and embarrassment and shock gripped him. But that just seemed to make Roxas laugh harder. "Fucking _hell_, look at you! I haven't seen a face that red since I beat Riku's into a bloody fucking pulp last year! What are you, some kinda wussy little virgin?"

Tragically, Axel's voice refused to come out normally. He barely managed a weak, thin, high-pitched whisper – "Um, if you could turn in your math book to chapter three…"

"Holy shit!" Roxas laughed out loud – a sharp sound, but not as mean. More…startled and incredulous. "Are you fucking _serious?_ You haven't had sex! You're, what, fucking 17 or 18 or something, right? My big brother had a _kid_ before then! What the hell is wrong with you? You got a tiny dick or something?"

Offended, Axel opened his mouth to retort, but found he didn't know exactly what to say…and in the short pause of silence, Roxas rose suddenly, kicked his chair over, leaned over the table, and grabbed his privates.

"_Oh_." Dark-rimmed blue eyes widened.

"Hey!" Axel jumped up, lurching back reflexively, breaking free. "You…y-y-you…d-don't you ever…" Axel's throat kept closing around the words. His face had to be _purple _by now.

A strange intensity had entered those shocking blue eyes, now fixed on his crotch. "Jesus H. Christ. Was that for real, or have you got socks stuffed in there, Cherry Boy?"

"_Socks!?_" Axel's voice squeaked, pure horror masking his face.

Those eyes flicked up to his face and Roxas smirked. "No…I guess not." He straightened slowly. "I don't have a fucking clue how you can be that hung and still be such a prude, but holy shit, Cherry…" Roxas slowly slipped his tongue out, wetting his lips. "You dress like a nerd, but for a cock like that, I wouldn't care. I'd fuck you right here, right fucking now."

"Oh my _gosh! No!_" Axel was too shocked to be embarrassed by his voice cracking this time.

Roxas opened his mouth and moved as if to come around the desk – but he didn't get the chance. Axel fled.

~o~

The next time he had to tutor, Axel went through the whole day with butterflies in his stomach and a tension headache. He dreaded seeing Roxas again, couldn't stand the idea of trying to teach that sullen, sexual, cussing, cute… _Cute!? No, crude!_ …Crude, rebellious kid.

However, when he entered the tutoring room and saw Roxas, he was surprised. The kid had his book out on the desk, his homework in front of him. Axel blinked for a moment. Roxas was still every bit the punk from before, and his deep blue eyes still held a sharpness that unnerved him, but he wasn't glaring and he wasn't leering. Taking a deep breath, Axel sat down and opened his book.

"So," Roxas asked casually, "you wanna fuck me today, Cherry?"

The answer was a dark flush and a fit of coughing. Roxas snickered…and then mercifully let it go with a sigh. "Oh well. I guess we can do this math bullshit, if it'll make you feel better."

Still red, Axel forced his voice out. "That would be ideal, thank you."

Roxas laughed.

~o~

Axel finished marking the quiz. "Seventy-four. That's a C. You're doing better."

A wicked little grin. "Yeah? How about fucking me as a reward? I worked so goddamn fucking hard, yanno. Gimme that big, fat cock, Cherry."

By now, Axel was getting used to the horribly inappropriate comments. He only blushed a little this time, and generally assumed that Roxas was teasing. Teasing he could handle…well, sort of. He wasn't always quick enough to think of the right response in the moment – sometimes the perfect thing to say would only come to him hours later, in the middle of the night – but he was at least _used _to being teased. So this…this wasn't so bad.

"Um, no. So let's go over the section where you made the most mistakes…"

"I don't get a reward at _all?_" Roxas grumbled. "Come on, I've never got a fucking C before."

Axel rolled his eyes. To him, a C was hardly something to be proud of. "I'm _not_ doing anything sexual with you. Just…there's no way."

"Prude." Roxas rolled his eyes and twisted a ring on his thumb. "So answer a fucking question. You like when I ask questions. Answer me one, for my reward."

Axel eyed his student sidelong. "Okayyy…what?" He wasn't at all sure he should be agreeing to this.

Roxas brightened, grinned, and asked without missing a beat, "How big is your dick, really?"

Cheeks pink, Axel mumbled, "Um, I don't see why I should tell you that. It's private."

"Oh _please!_" Roxas growled. "It's a _dick_, okay? I've got one too, and it gets to be about six fucking inches long when I'm hard. I'll whip it out and show you right now if you don't fucking tell me how long your shit is, so just…"

"No!" Axel quite simply panicked at the idea of Roxas pulling out his privates right there in the classroom. "I…I'll tell, don't…don't show me!" Roxas watched him, waiting with an arched eyebrow. Axel cleared his throat. "Um…w-well…I guess about…" His voice shrank to a whisper. "…Eight?"

Eyelids drooping to half-cover his eyes, Roxas licked his lips. "Eight inches when you're hard?" Axel nodded, not daring to look up. "How thick?" He blinked, glancing up in shock. The corner of Roxas' mouth was curled upward as he played with the barbell in his tongue. "Make a fist the right size, like you're gonna beat one off. You gotta give a _complete answer_ to the fucking question," he used one of Axel's favorite instructions against him.

Gulping, Axel's hands shook as he formed a shape, out of sight under the desk. He then slowly lifted his hand into view. His fingertips just touched his thumb – and Axel's hands were quite large.

Roxas stared, eyelashes fluttering, and moaned deeply. "Oh _fuck_. Eight inches of _that?_ Oh shit, Cherry, I think I'm gonna cum just imagining you inside my hole…"

Axel fled. Again.

~o~

"You know I wouldn't actually fucking rape you, right?"

Axel glanced up. Another day, another tutoring session. Roxas was watching him with narrow eyes. He blinked in response. Roxas huffed.

"It's just, you run like a little bitch whenever I start talking about fucking. Like I'm gonna fuck you just because I'm talking about it." He shrugged. "Just wanted to make sure you know that's bullshit."

Still staring, Axel finally managed, "…Is it?"

Leaning back, Roxas smirked. "Well, I mean, if you ever _wanted_ to, I'd still fuck your brains out on this desk. But I guess that would be _against the rules_ for Mr. Serious Student, so…fine." He rolled one shoulder upward. "I won't do it. I'm not _that_ fucking nasty. You don't have to run like a little pussy, is all I'm saying. It doesn't suit you."

"So…" Axel felt his ever-present tension around Roxas dissipating just a bit, "why do you have to talk like that? Because we seriously have work to do here, and it's not helping…"

A snort. "Fuck the work. Fuck this shithole of a school up its brown back door. But if you wanna know why I talk about sex," Roxas grinned leaning forward, "it's because when I'm around _you_, sex is all I can think about. D'you know, I've never fucked a virgin? Never wanted to, either. I like fucking people who know how to make me cum so hard I black out. And I don't like nerds, so it's not some twisted, shitty little kink." He slipped a hand across the table and brushed fingertips – black and glittery fingernails – across Axel's hand. "I guess I just kinda like you, Cherry."

Something warm swelled in Axel's chest, even as his mind snapped at him not to get so happy over some delinquent sophomore. Still – it was so good to hear it. He always tried so hard to please everyone because it just _bothered_ him so much when someone didn't like him. And if _Roxas_ liked him – Roxas, who didn't seem to like _anyone_ – well…that was special.

"Does that mean you'll do me a big favor and stop talking about sex and focus on math?" Axel grinned sheepishly.

Roxas laughed, and it was…really a much freer, happier sound than Axel had expected from him. "Hell no! Math is bullshit. And if I'm stuck thinking about fucking you all the time, you might as well hear some of it. Fucking unfair, otherwise."

A little crease appeared between his eyebrows. "_All_ the time?" Axel wasn't sure he wanted to know.

"Oh hell yes. All the _fucking_ time." The smirk returned in full force, and Roxas was playing with his tongue piercing again. "You and your eight inch cock are all I think about when I beat off anymore."

Axel…_wanted_ to run, but he made himself stay put. After the reassurances Roxas had just given him, he'd be cowardly to flee now. "I really don't think that's an appropriate topic for…"

"Oh, shush-shush-shush…" Roxas reached over and…touched a fingertip to Axel's lips. Everything stopped for Axel. "Cherry, baby, I know." Roxas' voice has dropped to a soft, gentle sort of tone. Axel _literally_ couldn't move to save his life. That fingertip brushed softly from side to side, tracing the shape of his upper lip, then the lower one. "You're an eighteen-year-old virgin, right? You're waiting for true love, or some shit like that. It's okay. I mean, normally I'd give you hell for it, but…I dunno. Seems more cute than stupid on you, I guess." He pressed the finger gently into Axel's lips and winked. "Fucking _adorable, _actually."

He pulled back at that, releasing Axel from whatever hypnosis had kept him frozen. Blushing – naturally – and glancing down to fiddle with the math worksheets, Axel cleared his throat. "Uh, um…wh-why…would you…"

"I know, I know," Roxas admitted casually, "dorks aren't my thing, your sense of fashion makes me cringe, all that shit." He clicked his tongue piercing at Axel once, mischievous. "I could say it's your big, hot cock I really want…" he smiled, "…but maybe I'm just into you."

~o~

Of all the things Axel hadn't expected, the sleepless nights, heart palpitations, and butterflies in his stomach were probably on a whole new list entirely – the List of Impossibly Beyond the Unexpected. It was quite disruptive to his schedule…and getting breathless and consequently lightheaded and dizzy whenever he saw Roxas made him a little concerned for his health. He wasn't sure he should ask the school nurse about it though. The nurse tended to kick you out of the infirmary unless you were bleeding or vomiting.

So, he tried focusing on steady breathing when he entered the tutoring classroom. It helped with the dizziness, but the butterflies and the irregular heartbeat got worse. Axel wondered if he had a chemical imbalance in his brain.

And one day, Roxas seemed to take it into his head to sit at the long work table in the room, rather than in a little desk. Axel had a brief premonition of doom, but waved it off as crazy. Changing up seats wasn't unusual. Nothing to worry about.

He was halfway through the first page of Roxas' homework before Roxas proved him wrong.

Without warning or excuse, Roxas rose from his seat, hopped up onto the table, and lay down on his back, stretching out along the length of the flat surface…and lying back to rest his head right on top of the paper Axel was looking over.

Axel…froze. "Um…what the heck are you doing?"

Roxas just smiled up at him lazily, blinking slowly into his eyes. "Getting your fucking attention," he sweetly offered.

"Th-that's…not…"

"Hey…there's nothing to be scared of…" Roxas lifted a hand, and Axel's heart slammed into his ribcage as fingertips brushed through his hair, "…Cherry."

Throat feeling like it was more than half closed up already, Axel forced out, "Why…do you…w-want my…"

"Well, as much as I fucking love to get stuffed with a big cock," Roxas gave him a teasing grin, "at the moment I was actually hoping you'd kiss me." His hand played in Axel's hair, finding its way to his neck and drawing playful little patterns over the skin behind and below his ear.

The worst part was the touching. No, the worst part was the _asking_. No, really, the worst part was the request for a kiss – or was it that Roxas suddenly looked _serious?_ Whatever it was, this was terrible, because sex was easy to refuse – there was no way Axel was losing his virginity in a classroom, _no way. _But a kiss? That…was the one thing Axel had been _aching_ for. How was he supposed to say no? Roxas was right _there!_

With a light tug at a strand of red hair, Roxas murmured through a little smile, "…Please?"

"_Nnnh…_" Axel made a helpless little sound as his breath escaped him in a sigh or a moan or something like that, some little sound of unwilling surrender as he leaned down, his neck muscles giving out and refusing to maintain the distance between them. He trembled as their lips touched, his eyes falling shut in misery and ecstasy – it was painful to surrender, but it was also warm and soft and blissful.

Roxas…did _not_ tremble.

Two hands buried themselves in his thick hair, angling his head just a bit as Roxas met his hesitant kiss with full, eager caresses. He didn't open his mouth right away – _Thank goodness_, Axel would have panicked if he had – but he pressed into the kiss and moved with a hunger that infected Axel almost immediately. When he did open his mouth – only a minute later – Axel was somehow already waiting for it.

Hands flattened on the table's surface on either side of Roxas' head, and Axel straightened his legs, sending his chair toppling, but neither of them heard it because Axel was leaning over Roxas now, half-lying on top of him, and it was so much less awkward than kissing at right angles. This was probably a 30 to 45-degree angle, _much _more comfortable, and…

Roxas' warm, wet tongue slipped into Axel's mouth, and all thought of calculating angles vanished from his mind. All thoughts _period_ disappeared, except for _Holy crap, holy crap, holy crap,_ and _This is making out, we're making out, _and most of all – _Roxas. Wow._

Hands played around his neck, caressing the skin, slipping under his shirt collar a bit, playing with pieces of hair, squeezing his shoulders. It was…innocent, compared to what Roxas was doing with his tongue – and the wicked, wicked little barbell in the middle of it. When Roxas cupped his face with his hands, it was…sweet. And yet, at the same time, his mouth was moving with a passionate, heady lust. It was hot and gentle, wonderful and scary.

And Roxas was pushing himself up, leaning his body into Axel's as he forced his way to a sitting position, then turned toward him. Axel nearly choked when he felt legs gently squeeze on either side of his hips. He was standing, Roxas was sitting, and…_ I'm between his legs. _Roxas' crotch was probably barely an inch from touching his. _Holy crap._

For a moment, Axel reflexively tried to pull his hips back. He didn't want any contact to start up – accidental or otherwise. Roxas felt the movement, though, and wrapped his arms around Axel, pulling on his back to bring him closer again – but not quite _that_ close. Lips brushed his own, then lower over his jaw line as Roxas murmured, "Jesus Christ, Cherry, will you stop freaking out and fucking _trust me_ for a goddamn minute?" His lips moved down again, little licks of that hot tongue beginning to moisten his throat as Roxas whispered, "You're already giving me what I wanted. I'm not gonna take more, so just…fucking…_relax_, okay?"

Axel bit his lip, his hands hovering – he wasn't sure what to do with them. But Roxas was kissing his neck, now, and…and _sucking…_ "_Mmmmh…_" His hands fell to rest on the little punk's narrow hips. "Oh…okay," Axel sighed, his head falling back, granting access.

Roxas hummed and buried his face in the crook of Axel's neck, mouthing more passionately.

All Axel could do was let it happen. His hands shifted around on Roxas' hips, but only a little because he didn't want to touch…certain places. He stared up at the ceiling for a bit, face tight with uncertainty…until the fluorescent lights of the classroom began to put spots on his vision. Or maybe it was Roxas playing heck with his nervous system. Either way, Axel's eyes fell shut, and he didn't really realize he was speaking until _after_ he'd whimpered, "Feels…feels so good…"

"Yeah," Roxas' hot breath tingled over his saliva-covered neck. The kisses were slowing down – still intense, but lingering longer in each spot. Luxuriating. "Tell me more," he whispered.

A little frown creased between Axel's brows. "Like…like what?"

"Tell me…" Roxas' voice took on the sound of a smile, "tell me how you feel about me."

_Oh gosh_. "I don't…I don't know," Axel panted, "but…I've never felt this way about anyone else."

A rough little giggle. "Come on, you don't know? You know _something_." He pulled back and shot Axel a heavy-lidded, teasing look.

He swallowed. Raised his hands. Cradled Roxas' face – above the spiked collar, being careful not to get his fingers tangled in any of his ear piercings. "I feel like…like I want to see you all the time, not just for tutoring. Like I want to hang out in school, and after school, and…and walk around holding your hand." His thumbs rubbed along Roxas' cheekbones, and he leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to those moist lips. "And…and I want to…to take you on dates…and be your b-boyfriend…" Another quick peck. "And I want my family to meet you and be so impressed, and I'd be so proud, but I don't know if they'd…oh, shoot. I, um, smeared your eyeliner, I'm sorry…"

Roxas snorted, grinning. "Fuck the eyeliner." Then he kissed Axel again, deep and warm, and when he pulled back he lifted one of Axel's hands from his face and wove their fingers together. "I want all that shit too," he murmured sweetly, "…_and_, I want you to fuck my brains out. A _lot_." He winked. "But that can wait until you're ready, Cherry."

Resting his forehead against Roxas', Axel bit his lip. "I don't…I don't know if people will underst—"

"_Fuck_ people. People are assholes; they can go fuck themselves. I don't give a shit what anyone thinks. I don't even care if your goddamn parents hate me, but I'll try to keep that from happening, because it would probably fuck your life up quite a bit. The important thing is…I _like_ you, Axel." His breath caught in his throat. Roxas smiled and kissed him again, long and lingering, a perfectly sweet press of lips, just a little bit too sensual to be called _chaste_. Then Roxas was grinning again. "Jesus, why'd you think I kept _coming_ to this fucking tutoring room? Normally I'd show up once, maybe twice, till that bitch gets used to signing my pass and stops asking questions. Then I'd start skipping, hang out in the bathrooms until the last bell or some shit. This is _last fucking period_. You think I'm in the mood to _study_ at this point? I've been putting up with all your goddamn algebra just so I can _see_ you."

Stunned and unsure what to say, all Axel managed was, "It's not _my_ algebra…it's _your_ algebra. I'm in calculus."

Snickering, Roxas answered, "It could be a banana cream pie – I still wouldn't fucking show up for that." He leaned in again, and Axel opened his mouth to another slow, invasive kiss. Axel moaned softly into Roxas' mouth.

When Roxas pulled back, Axel had to breathe for a second before he could trust his voice. "Can I…take you on a date this Friday night?"

Roxas' answer was a pleased purr, "Abso-fucking-lutely."

Blushing, Axel cleared his throat. "Um…if I take you somewhere nice…d-do you think you could cuss a little less?"

Roxas laughed. "For you, Cherry? Fuck yeah."

~o~

**Note to readers!** Hey guys! If you read this because you're into Axel and Roxas and that's pretty much it, well...thanks! I hope you liked it! :D But if you _also_ wonder if this Kurosora1984 lady has anything else to entertain you, and if you are even a little interested in _other_ guys getting their sexy romance on, check out my current original story on FP! Links in my profile! Thank you, dears! :D


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